Obliterate!

why me?

2009-09-17T03:14:00.000-07:00

I try to do all the things the right way. All the way that I think would benefit everyone. Lahat lahat na halos. Pero ang pinagtataka ko ay kung bakit ba ako parati ang nasasaktan. Tang ina naman. Lahat halos ng bagay na ikinabubuti ng lahat e ako pa ang nasasaktan. Sana nalang ako na ang ginawang tagasalo ng karma ng kasamaan. Nakakapikon lang siya talaga. It really pissess me off. Pure bullshit.

My mother is the reason. Yes. Now I am really pissed off kng papaano niya ako treated today. It was pure bullshit. Fucking pieces of shitty asshats ang ipinabukangbibig nanaman ng nanay ko. Putang ina. Lahat na halos ng bagay na napakalayo sa aming pinagtatalunan ay ibinaril sa ulo ko. It's bullets of pure nonsense.

Sure, take the point that I lied to her (which I don't remember doing btw) but that dosn't have anything connected with me being a prideful person. Nakakasakit na siya talaga ng ego. Gusto ko na talaga siyang murahin but because I can't because she's superior for somme Godforsaken reason. Blessed be her name >_> TANG INAAA! Shet. ! Sana inabort na lang ako.

Yes. I wish. so. Why? Kasi I was formed through pemarital sex. DAMNIT. SAAN HINDI NINYO NA LANG AKO INILUWAL MGA GAGO AT GAGA KUNG GANOON NAMAN AKO KAIPABIGAT SA INYOO! SHET TANG INA!

She thinks that I'm a goddamn lair. Liar. Born as a liar and will grow up as a theif. SHET SHET SHET.

WHY THE FUCKING HELL

2009-09-17T02:43:00.000-07:00

I guess it is a crush. Dammit.

2009-09-11T02:39:00.000-07:00

I guess it's really confirmed. Medyo crush ko nga si Punay. Oh. Joy joy joy. I guess that's why I dreamt of him as the Phantom of the Opera. Ah. Dammit. -__- Hindi ko talaga alam kung bakit ako nag-curse even though a thought of him makes me smile at the very least :3 X3 D'AWWW I CAN'T STOP THINKING! :))

Though I have deviced a plan that will make me take piccies of him. Yes. I shall keep that plan as a secret for now I think :3...

...But I sure am bedazzled~

FIIIINAAAL.... not -_-

2009-09-10T06:13:00.001-07:00

Well, if you were in a normal school, normal lang na bukas na ang huli ninyong araw ng exams. Pwes kami hindi. Pagdududsahan pa namin ang saturday para lang sa exam na iyan. It really pisses me off on how schools give us students extra credit assignemnts and add it off as an REQUIREMENT. HELLOOOOO! Kaya nga extra credit e.

... ANd it's a saturday. SATURDAY. Pati nga Diyos kinakailangan ng pahinga e, kami pa?

Well, as of now, naki-hang out muli ako with CamziE and AivY~ Ah two best friends that I could never live without. Chantal? Meh. Sarap sapakin nun hanggang dumugo ang bawat piraso ng buto na ginagamit para lamang makatayo pa siya. It may sound mean, but it's the truth. I can't hide the truth. I can't. It's what reflects me. Hiding it would just make me feel more miserable and would just... bah.

Typing my pains would just make me lessen my heart's density. Yes. Parang atoms no? nahahahla lalalala.... O_o stupid science, keeping mg mind bizzare na pati blogging ko ay nahahaluan na. SHET. SHETTY SHET E:))

As for Louie, well, Hindi ako sigurado but I'm really enjoying kung paano siya nagpapapansin ha. Imagine, MUNGGO :))

Anyways Looking forward for tommorrow ^^ SEVEN ELEVEN MGA KAPATID!

FIIIINAAAL.... not -_-

2009-09-10T06:13:00.000-07:00

What I want to be

2009-08-04T23:39:00.000-07:00

I realised today why I'm here.I've never put much thought into what I want to do with my life. Which is pretty shameful. I've always said I want to make people happy even at my own expense, and since I seem to do well with the humour thing I went ahead and put a lot of effort into doing that.But I've never really known what I'm here for. What I want out of life more than anything in the world. But after discussion with certain people, and watching a few videos online, and just general reflection on my life... I know

I want to be a mother.

More than anything, I want that. To raise a child. To see them grow. To teach them, to praise them, to scold them. To love them. I want to worry about them when they're not around, and tell them how much they mean to me when we get the occasional sappy moment together, and discover how similar/different we are. I want a child. I want children. I want to be their mother.

I wanna be someone's mom so badly.As soon as I realised that, I immediately felt so relaxed, even in the poorly air-conditioned stockroom where I was carrying about fifteen different sleeping bags under my arms and with a tent tucked under my chin. I knew it was right. I've always been very keen to have children, but I never once thought of how hugely important it was to me.

The idea of being a mother.I now understand why it always hurt so much when people would say to me "You'd make a great mom!" Because the truth is, I think I would. As self-centred as it might be, I would make a bloody good mom, because I would put everything into making sure I gave my children respect and love and support and everything they need just to get a smile on their face at the end of a long day. Even at my expense. Especially at my expense.

Now that I know what I want to do with my life, more than anything else, I know that if I stayed in that situation it would have killed me inside.I want to be a mother. I need to be a mother. I can only pray it will happen someday.I'd like to think I'd make a good mother.

I just hope that God would allow me to be.

(BUT NOT TOO SOON! XD)

Meh. Meh. Meh.

2009-07-16T17:14:00.000-07:00

Well, School hasn't change much. Sure is fun! . . . . NOT. I've been really busy. Plus to that my classmates arent' much of a helping hand.

You see, I got to be the oh-so-lucky person who shall teach the whole section to dance. Of course, they chose Michael Jackson's Dangerous. And yet they're the one who's forcing me to do the choreographs. God. Can't they friggin dance? I'm a new student and they're the one who's putting all the weight down my shoulders. Can't they depend on someone who's an old student who's much more EXPERIENCED AND KNOWN?! God.

I couldn't say no. They looked so pityful. And my teacher did say she'd give me extra credit grade. So, guess, I have no excuse to say no... After all, Dancing is one of my lives, and of course, I can do Michael Jackson. I may not be able to do it the EXACT way he does his moves and grooves but, I guess, you can say mine's pretty acceptable as an immitation =))

Leave me alone!

2009-07-12T01:11:00.000-07:00

Migg! What the hell is your problem anyway?!

I've already explained to you that I don't want anything to do with you. You want things all so oh-so-fast! I'm just not that ready for those things. Accept that fact already damnit.

I'm too young to carry such assloads of responsebilities and to have a boyfriend. YOu among all people should know that.

just effing leave me alone.

The Reality Of Cosplaying

2009-07-04T05:06:00.000-07:00

Cosplaying is a fun hobby for some of those who are into the Japanese culture and animation. And it is something to enjoy doing no matter what size one is or of what race or which region of the world one comes from. However, with love for the hobby sprouts hatred amongst each other, and also competition. One must ask why must you hate a person just because they are not of the right height, or their skin color do not match the character that they are cosplaying. As long as one enjoys cosplaying their character, and loves it, that should be enough. One should not be judged so harshly. And yet to this day, we have cosplay idols that we admire. But what makes them that special? Perhaps their personality but also a combination of things that is touched upon in this passage. For they seem perfect. They give us a sense of perfection that is way beyond our comprehension. And because of this, we wish to become like them and look up to them.

But then again what about the minor cosplayers, the ones that are not popular, yet cosplays as good as the idols that everyone looks up to? Shouldn't they get a fair share too? I am not saying that I am a good cosplayer but everyone deserves their own credit and it sickens me to the core to know that a person is cool and admired just because a gazillion people are specifically in love with their cosplays because of how they portray them in their minds. Because beneath that tough exterior, they may be assholes not saying that they are of course. But they are human as well like the rest of us.

I find that people bother their idols a lot. And I am of no exception. However, there are also rules one must follow. Stalking. An absolute no. That is crossing the line, my friend. To one, they may be idols but one must remember the most important thing. They ARE human beings just like the rest of us. And also insults and rude remarks are to be kept to yourself, not expressed openly to them. If you want to express it, ignore how inperfect they seem to you. And if that doesn't work, just punch a wall or something. Isn't that the perfect solution? Perhaps not to YOU but to me it is. All I am trying to say is, a hobby that everyone loves should stay a fun and loving hobby instead of something that people wouldn't want to do anymore due to insults. And honestly, it sickens to me as well how much people get arrogant over cosplaying which brings me to the next topic that will be stated in this long essay like writing piece.

Cosplaying is NOT a competition unless you enter a cosplay competition then that's fine but other than that outside of a real cosplay competion, cosplay is NOT a competition no matter how much you think it is. And if you think it is, you better think it over and think it over very well. What gives one to say that one is better than the other? Nothing. And that is the way reality is. It's like saying that one is forbidden from doing something just because he or she is not good at it. And if one reads this through, they would find that all of the points spoken here are all valid. People should not be judged on what they want to do and who they want to cosplay. Even if a plump person cosplays a skinny character, and you dislike it, just ignore them and move past. This is not a competition of who's better looking and portrays the character the cosplay well, and things like that. Leave it for an actual competition where judges will look upon every detail. And because of this, cosplay drama starts. Well there are also other reasons. But I find that this is the main reason.

Another last point that is also brought to my attention is the fact of bought cosplays versus made cosplays. Sure one may feel egotistical if they made their cosplay more than one who doesn't and buys their cosplay and it's because they actually made something while the others don't. However, it doesn't give the person the right to be stuck up, snobbish and act all "Queen or King of the World". I have encountered a few kinds of people like these while I have been browsing through some sites and it's quite a bad thing. It's not like you can force someone to sew on the spot if they have no sewing skills at all especially if they are busy with other things in life. As long as those people who buy cosplays tell others that they didn't make their cosplays admitting it , they would be fine in my books otherwise I can see maybe why you put them down? But basically in the end, one shouldn't put down another just because one bought their cosplay while one made their cosplay thinking they (being the ones that make their cosplay) are just oh so much better than them (the ones that buy their cosplays).

I hope this part makes sense to you all that are reading this. I admit that maybe some of the ones that do make cosplays also build up a bigger ego despite not really intentionally wanting to, and they show it off to others their skill but at long as they don't flaunt that fact that they can make awesome cosplays in a bad manner or insulting the ones who have less skills than them, it's alright. And it's also not their fault. I just do not want to see anyone getting hurt because of their non-sewing talent in the end because we all know emotions are a very tender part of a human body and might eventually cause drama. It will be the bad kind that we don't want which leads me to saying that the ones that usually do shows off this mistake intentionally are the ones that seriously needed to be lectured on the subject because sometimes their ignorance shines through and they ignore you so...there is no change for those who have minds set on being arrogant over cosplays. But for the ones that seem there is still a chance of changing their attitude and behavior, we as a whole (the cosplay community) should try to get them to look and think the right way.

Any who that's all I wanted to say. Thanks for reading this cosplay article. Just remember to keep enjoying and be nice when you cosplay to others and to yourself. It'll make a lot of people in the world happy. Respect and be friends with one another. Be polite. After all, don't we as a whole, love cosplaying? And want to enjoy it more than having people especially random strangers ruining it for you because of a comment like "Your cosplay sucks. You don't look good. You shouldn't cosplay that character."? This is an era where people should be mature and stay that way about everything unless you are like a kid of course then it's somewhat understandable for your behavior but teens you should know better.

I could go on and on but I shall stop here before I sound like I am repeating myself. Just appreciate others like they do you and you will find your life a lot easier without any unwanted drama.

Mo-wat?

2009-06-30T05:54:00.000-07:00

Cosplay? Model? Cosplaying model? Modeling Cosplayer? What am I Seriously?

Well I didn't go to school today. Why? Because I'm helluva sick-o. Darn darn darn strong rains. darn darn darn it all. Herm. Aanyway, I've got better and harder and heavier issues to deal with rather than this.

First, I'm due with my cosplay. I've been soo dang busy with school that I haven't got the opportunity to update my Squall Cosplay. Q_Q Isn't it sad? I already had meh gunblade all funked up and spickeymackyeicccabakyooukawaiinereallywaeseomne'd. Q_Q It's sad. sad sad indeed.

Second, my Aunt gave me this opportunity to be the LIght cameo test model. Meaning I model a little and in exchange I get a small amount of fee.

It's quite nice. :)) But my auntie said I could get a part-time modeling intership with this if I get discovered. Which I wish I would and wouldn't at the same time.

I would like to be because I love pictures. simple as that

I wouldn't because my mom'sa biiitchy diet freak for crying out loud so the possibilites of tight diets are just unbearable.

I never knew I could love like this.

2009-06-27T23:51:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the start of something great for me. Probbably a door just opened for my heart for new opportunities. Or maybe even new love or possibilites. I'm not mensioning but it's caused me to be utmostly happy to the depths of my heart ^^

And it is all thanks to one person. I shall hide him behind the name of atom.

I live the crazy Life.

2009-06-13T00:05:00.000-07:00

"She's Livin La Vida Loca" - Chazz Princeton.

Now you may all be wondering, 'Why teh heck is that chazz princeton quoted?! It's supposed to be Ricky Martin God Dammit you mother fucking idiot!'. Well let me explain first before you stick out that oh-so-favorite finger at me. Trust me. It'll save your curiosity and the enegrgy of even lifting out that magical finger (not to mension the use of those colorful words)

I've been daydreaming a lot nowadays. Cosplay sewing hasn't muchly entertained me. Now, what am I imagining / dreaming about? Well, it's nto something personal >_> It's not green or associated with sex or any of those genitalia-throbbing-sensation kind of things, mind you. (I'm not that disgusting of a person. Unlike some people. :)) )

Ive been daydreaming (and imagining) random YU-GI-OH! Stuffs. Random things that a normal person would have troubles digesting. NO. IT IS NOT YAOI, YURI OR WHAT-KNOT you lemony people. (Especially you Jamie, I know your reading this and imagining Seto and Joey having sex over the dinner table. That's just bad Jamie. Bad fangirl! Bad! Bad!)

Well, I've dreamt and imagined a lot, but the one that stuck to my brain is Chazz Princeton, Singing Livin La Vida Loca.

I;ll explayn the whole details later. Right now, it's project time so. yeah.

:))

nothing so new

2009-05-24T06:37:00.000-07:00

Nothing's really new today. . . Well one thing's for sure, Hayden-Katrina Scandal issue's everywhere. Cable TV dosn't help much with entertainment.

I've decided to do off the finishing touches of my Dark Mousey (DN ANGEL) and Allen Walker (D-GRAYMAN) Cosplay. Sewing, my one way ticket for time-wasting freedom.

I've accomplished quite a lot in a small amount of time. I've done putting up those belt-buckles of some sort over Mousey's coat and i've put up the buttons on Allen Walker's uniform.

The styling of Dark's wig is another story of some sort.

I gor real bored. I had nothing better to do. It sucked the life out of my non-extending summer... since school shall start by the 3rd of June. I just had to draw something..

I ended up with this

I'm bored. Up until now.

someone pass me my sippy cup.

Because I Forgot

2009-05-24T06:24:00.001-07:00

Slifer Hime-san! :D

why new? Because I forgot my password.

nways, hope this one stays in mind like glue!

Because I Forgot

2009-05-24T06:24:00.000-07:00

Slifer Hime-san! :D

why new? Because I forgot my password.

nways, hope this one stays in mind like glue!